Letting Go

I know I am the world's worst blog writer but I have to let it out. It is near impossible for me to just let anything or everything go.
Is it possible to hate a part of yourself so much that you always try to change but never can? More importantly, is it possible to have a character flaw you can never shake off.

I am not blind to the negative aspects of being human. In my head I realize that I will never be perfect but it is hard for me to accept my flaws.
My personality leaves much to be desired in the way of grudge holding.
I like to think I don't hold grudges but it is painfully obvious that I easily get bitter and can hold a grudge like no other bitty I know.
The thing about being bitter and angry (which goes along with holding a grudge) is that it hurts no one else but the grudge holder. I am only hurting myself, a lot like a teenage cuter who just likes to see the blood.
I am so bitter toward my job for everything it is causing me to miss, for all the hours I put in, for the fact that my paycheck says I only work 44 hours a week instead of close to 60, for not being able to see my family, and for doing something I hate...Retail Sales.
I am trying but so far I just have not been able to let a lot of anger go....